Shulchan Aruch, Even HaEzer Siman 155

Siman 155

Presented here for study, not as a practical ruling. The Shulchan Aruch rules by Sephardi custom, the Rema's glosses by Ashkenazi custom, and the Kitzur follows Ashkenazi custom. For a practical question, ask your rabbi.

א קְטַנָּה שֶׁאֵין לָהּ אָב, אוֹ שֶׁיֵּשׁ לָהּ אָב וְהִשִּׂיאָהּ אָבִיהָ וְנִתְאַלְמְנָה אוֹ נִתְגָּרְשָׁה כְּשֶׁהִיא קְטַנָּה, שֶׁהִיא כִּיתוֹמָה בְּחַיֵּי הָאָב, שֶׁהֲרֵי אֵין לוֹ עוֹד רְשׁוּת בָּהּ, וְהִשִּׂיאוּהָ לְדַעְתָּהּ, כֵּיוָן שֶׁאֵין קִדּוּשֶׁיהָ אֶלָּא מִדְּרַבָּנָן, אִם אֵינָהּ חֲפֵצָה בְּבַעְלָהּ אֵינָהּ צְרִיכָה מִמֶּנּוּ גֵּט, אֶלָּא יוֹצֵאת מִמֶּנּוּ בְּמֵאוּן. אֲבָל אִם הִשִּׂיאוּהָ שֶׁלֹּא לְדַעְתָּהּ, אוֹ אֲפִלּוּ לְדַעְתָּהּ, וְאֵינָהּ יוֹדַעַת לִשְׁמֹר קִדּוּשֶׁיהָ, אֲפִלּוּ מֵאוּן אֵינָהּ צְרִיכָה. הַגָּה: וּלְכַתְּחִלָּה יֵשׁ לְבֵית דִּין לִזָהֵר שֶׁלֹּא לְהַשִּׂיא יְתוֹמָה קְטַנָּה בְּמָקוֹם שֶׁנִּרְאֶה לָהֶם שֶׁיָּבֹא לִידֵי מֵאוּן. וְאֵין לַדַּיָּן בְּזֶה אֶלָּא מַה שֶּׁעֵינָיו רוֹאוֹת (הַגִּהוֹת מַיְמוֹנִי פֶּרֶק י"א בְּשֵׁם ר"י):
1 A ketana [girl less than 12 years and a day old] who does not have a father, or she has a father but her father had married her off and she became a widow or she was divorced while still a ketana, and thus she becomes like an orphan in her father's lifetime for he has no authority over her anymore, and she is married off with her permission, since her marriage is only on a rabbinical level, if she does not like her husband, she does not need a get [bill of divorce] from him, but rather she can leave through [the law of] me'un [where she can simply denounce the marriage]. But if she was married off without her permission, or even if it was with her permission, but she didn't know to keep her marriage, she doesn't even need me'un. Rema: Ideally the court should make sure not to allow the marriage of an orphan ketana when it seems it will end in me'un. And we can only judge this according to what we can see (Hagahot Maimoni perek 11 in the name of R"Y).
ב אֵיזוֹ הִיא קְטַנָּה שֶׁצְּרִיכָה לְמָאֵן, מִבַּת שֵׁשׁ שָׁנִים עַד בַּת עֶשֶׂר בּוֹדְקִין אוֹתָהּ לְפִי יֹפִי דַּעְתָּהּ אִם יוֹדַעַת לִשְׁמֹר קִדּוּשֶׁיהָ, וְשֶׁהֵם קִדּוּשִׁין, לֹא שֶׁתִּשְׁמֹר אוֹתָם כְּדֶרֶךְ שֶׁמְּשַׁמֶּרֶת הָאֱגוֹז וְהַתְּמָרָה וְכַיּוֹצֵא בָּהֶם, הֲרֵי זוֹ צְרִיכָה מֵאוּן. וְאִם אֵינָהּ יוֹדַעַת לִשְׁמֹר קִדּוּשֶׁיהָ, אֵינָהּ צְרִיכָה לְמָאֵן, אֶלָּא הוֹלֶכֶת לְבֵית אִמָּהּ כְּאִלּוּ לֹא נִתְקַדְּשָׁה מֵעוֹלָם. וּפְחוּתָה מִבַּת שֵׁשׁ, אֲפִלּוּ הִיא נְבוֹנָת לַחַשׁ בְּיוֹתֵר וְיוֹדַעַת לִשְׁמֹר, אֵינָהּ צְרִיכָה מֵאוּן. וִיתֵרָה עַל בַּת עֶשֶׂר, אֲפִלּוּ סְכָלָה בְּיוֹתֵר, צְרִיכָה מֵאוּן. הַגָּה: וְיֵשׁ אוֹמְרִים דְּכָל זֶה כְּשֶׁנִּשֵּׂאת לְדַעַת אַחֶיהָ וְאִמָהּ, אֲבָל אִם נִשֵּׂאת שֶׁלֹּא לְדַעְתָּן, אֵינָהּ צְרִיכָה לְמָאֵן (הַגָהוֹת אַלְפִסִי פֶּרֶק בֵּית שַׁמַאי). וְיֵשׁ אוֹמְרִים דְּאִם הִגִּיעָה לְפָעוֹטוֹת, צְרִיכָה לְמָאֵן (בֵּית יוֹסֵף בְּשֵׁם הִרִיטְבָ"א):
2 What is [a case of] a ketana [a girl less than 12 and a day] who must do a me'un [i.e. refusal of marriage which allows her to leave her husband when she is married off as a ketana]? From 6 years old until 10 years old, we examine her according to her intellectual abilities, if she knows [that she must] guard her marriage, and that when she is married, that the guarding is not like the guarding of a nut or date or similar, that is [a case where] she needs to perform me'un. But if she does not know to guard her marriage, she needs not me'un, but rather she can leave to her mother's house, as if she were never married. Less than 6, even if her sense of understand is great, and she knows to guard, she does not need me'un. More than 10, even if she is very dumb, she needs me'un. Rema: Some say that all this is only when she is married off by the permission of her brother and mother, but if she was married off without their permission, she does not need me'un [to go free] (Hagahot Alfasi perek Bet Shammai). Some say that if she is already past toddler's age, she needs to do me'un (Bet Yosef in the name of the Ritva).
ג הַמֵּאוּן הוּא שֶׁתֹּאמַר: אִי אֶפְשִׁי בִּפְלוֹנִי בַּעְלִי אוֹ אִי אֶפְשִׁי בַּקִּדּוּשִׁין שֶׁקִּדְּשׁוּנִי אִמִּי וְאַחַי. וַאֲפִלּוּ לֹא אָמְרָה דָּבָר, אֶלָּא הָלְכָה וְנִתְקַדְּשָׁה לְאַחֵר כְּשֶׁהִיא קְטַנָּה, אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁהָיְתָה נְשׂוּאָה, קִדּוּשֶׁיהָ הֵם הֵם מֵאוּנֶיהָ:
3 The me'un [i.e. refusal of marriage in which a ketana girl can go free from marriage without a bill of divorce] is when she says, "I do not like so-and-so my husband," or "I do not like the marriage my mother and brother set up." Even if she doesn't say anything, but leaves and gets proposed to someone else while she is a ketana [less than 12 and a day], even if she was in nissuin [full marriage], her proposal is her refusal.
ד מְמָאֶנֶת, בֵּין מִן הָאֵרוּסִין בֵּין מִן הַנִּשּׂוּאִין, אֲפִלּוּ שֶׁלֹּא בִּפְנֵי הַבַּעַל וְשֶׁלֹּא בִּפְנֵי בֵּית דִּין, רַק שֶׁיִּהְיֶה בִּפְנֵי שְׁנַיִם שֶׁיָּעִידוּ עַל הַדָּבָר. וְיֵשׁ מִי שֶׁאוֹמֵר, דִּלְכַתְּחִלָּה בָּעֵינָן ג':
4 A girl who does me'un [refusal of marriage while she is a ketana where she can go free without a bill of divorce]], whether it [is a refusal] from erusin [engagement] or from nissuin [full marriage], even if it was not in her husband's presence and not in the presence of the court, will only [work] when it is in front of two who will testify to it. And some say, ideally there needs to be three [witnesses].
ה כְּשֵׁם שֶׁמְּמָאֶנֶת בַּבַּעַל כָּךְ מְמָאֶנֶת בַּיָּבָם, אִם לֹא מֵאֲנָה בַּבַּעַל:
5 Just like she can do me'un [refusal of marriage when she is a ketana that allows her to go free even with a bill of divorce] to her husband, so too she can do me'un to her yibum [levirate marriage], if she didn't do me'un to her [present] husband.
ו מֵאֲנָה בַּבַּעַל וְנִשֵּׂאת לְאַחֵר, מְמָאֶנֶת בּוֹ. וְכֵן בַּשְּׁלִישִׁי וּבָרְבִיעִי, אֲפִלּוּ כַּמָּה פְּעָמִים, כָּל זְמַן שֶׁהִיא קְטַנָּה:
6 If she does me'un [refusal of marriage when she is married off as a ketana girl less than 12 and a day that allows her to go free without a bill of divorce] and she does nissuin [full marriage] with another, she may do me'un with him [as well]. And so with a third [husband] and a fourth [husband], even many times, so long as she is a ketana.
ז הַשְּׁנַיִם שֶׁמֵּאֲנָה בִּפְנֵיהֶם כּוֹתְבִין לָהּ גֵּט מֵאוּן וְחוֹתְמִין בּוֹ וְנוֹתְנִים לָהּ. וְאֵינוֹ כְּגֵט גֵּרוּשִׁין לִהְיוֹת נְתִינָתוֹ מְגָרֵשׁ, לְפִיכָךְ, אֵינוֹ צָרִיךְ כְּתִיבָה לִשְׁמָהּ, וְלֹא מְסִירָה, וְלֹא דָּבָר מִמִּשְׁפְּטֵי גֵּט הַגֵּרוּשִׁין. וְאֵין כּוֹתְבִין בּוֹ טֹפֶס הַגֵּט, לְפִי שֶׁאֵינוֹ אֶלָּא כְּמַעֲשֵׂה בֵּית דִּין:
7 The two [witnesses] in front of whom she refused [to marry the man to whom her father betrothed her] write for her a divorce document of refusal and sign in it and give it to her. It is not like a [regular] divorce document whose handing over creates the divorce. Therefore, it does not need to be written for her name, nor does it need to be handed over, nor does it need any of the requirements that a regular divorce document needs. And we do not write in it the regular formulation of the divorce document because it [the document] is nothing more than an action of the court.
ח אֵלּוּ שֶׁמְּמָאֶנֶת בִּפְנֵיהֶם צָרִיךְ שֶׁיַּכִּירוּ אוֹתָהּ וְאֶת בַּעְלָהּ. לְפִיכָךְ, כָּל מִי שֶׁיִּרְאֶה שֶׁמֵּאֲנָה בִּפְנֵי שְׁנַיִם יָכוֹל לִכְתֹּב לָהּ גֵּט מֵאוּן, אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁאֵינוֹ מַכִּירָהּ, שֶׁוַּדַּאי הִכִּירוּהָ אוֹתָם שֶׁמֵּאֲנָה בִּפְנֵיהֶם. וְדַוְקָא לְכַתְּחִלָּה, אֲבָל בְּדִיעֲבַד אֲפִלּוּ שֶׁאֵינָם מַכִּירִים הַבַּעַל רַק הָאִשָּׁה, סָגֵי (כ"כ הַב"י):
8 Those that she refuses [the marriage proposal] before must know both her and her husband. Therefore, all who see her refuse [the marriage proposal] before two may write a bill of divorce of refusal for her even if they do not know her, because she surely knows those before whom she refused [the marriage proposal]. Rema: This is true [that they must know both the woman and her husband] ideally, but even if they only know the woman and not the man, it is sufficient.
ט אוֹתָם שֶׁמְּמָאֶנֶת בִּפְנֵיהֶם צָרִיךְ שֶׁיִּתְבָּרֵר לָהֶם שֶׁהִיא קְטַנָּה:
9 Those who witness the refusal must verify that he is a minor.
י קְטַנָּה הַמְמָאֶנֶת אֵין לָהּ כְּתֻבָּה מָנָה וּמָאתַיִם, אֲבָל יֵשׁ לָהּ תּוֹסֶפֶת. וְכָל זְמַן שֶׁלֹּא מֵאֲנָה, בַּעְלָהּ זַכַּאי בְּמַעֲשֵׂה יָדֶיהָ וּבִמְצִיאָתָהּ, וְחַיָּב בִּמְזוֹנוֹתֶיהָ וּפִדְיוֹנָהּ כָּל זְמַן שֶׁהִיא תַּחְתָּיו, אֲבָל אִם הָלַךְ לִמְדִינַת הַיָּם, וְלָוְתָה וְאָכְלָה אוֹ לְצֹרֶךְ פִּדְיוֹנָהּ, וְעָמְדָה וּמֵאֲנָה, אֵינוֹ חַיָּב לְשַׁלֵּם, אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁאָכַל פֵּרוֹתֶיהָ, וַאֲפִלּוּ הֵם בָּעַיִן עֲדַיִן, שֶׁלִּקְּטָן וּמֻנָּחִין בִּרְשׁוּתוֹ, אֵינוֹ מַחֲזִירָן. וּנְכָסִין שֶׁל צֹאן בַּרְזֶל וְשֶׁל מְלוֹג, אִם הֵם בָּעַיִן, נוֹטַלְתָּן; וּמַה שֶּׁאָבַד מֵהֶם מִנִּכְסֵי צֹאן בַּרְזֶל, חַיָּב לְשַׁלֵּם; וּמִנִּכְסֵי מְלוֹג, פָּטוּר. וְהוּא מֻתָּר בִּקְרוֹבוֹתֶיהָ, וְהִיא מֻתֶּרֶת בִּקְרוֹבָיו, וּכְשֵׁרָה לִכְהֻנָּה, וְאֵינָהּ צְרִיכָה לְהַמְתִּין ג' חֳדָשִׁים מִלְּהִנָּשֵׂא; וְאִם נִשֵּׂאת לְאַחֵר וְגֵרְשָׁהּ אוֹ מֵת, מֻתֶּרֶת לַחֲזֹר לָרִאשׁוֹן. וְלֹא עוֹד, אֶלָּא אֲפִלּוּ גֵּרְשָׁהּ הָרִאשׁוֹן, וְהֶחֱזִירָהּ, וּמֵאֲנָה בּוֹ, וְנִשֵּׂאת לְאַחֵר אַחַר שֶׁמֵּאֲנָה בּוֹ, וְגֵרְשָׁהּ הָאַחֵר, מֻתֶּרֶת לַחֲזֹר לָרִאשׁוֹן. שֶׁכָּל הַיּוֹצֵאת בְּמֵאוּן, אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁקָּדְמוֹ גֵּט, הֲרֵי זוֹ כְּמִי שֶׁלֹּא נִתְגָּרְשָׁה מִמֶּנּוּ בְּגֵט מֵעוֹלָם, וּמֻתֶּרֶת לַחֲזֹר לוֹ. אֲבָל הַמְגָרֵשׁ אֶת הַקְּטַנָּה בְּגֵט, יֵשׁ לָהּ כְּתֻבָּה, וְאָסוּר בִּקְרוֹבוֹתֶיהָ, וַאֲסוּרָה בִּקְרוֹבָיו, וַאֲסוּרָה לִכְהֻנָּה, וּצְרִיכָה לְהַמְתִּין שְׁלשָׁה חֳדָשִׁים; וְאִם נִשֵּׂאת לְאַחֵר וּמֵאֲנָה בּוֹ, אֲסוּרָה לַחֲזֹר לָרִאשׁוֹן, מִפְּנֵי שֶׁיָּצְאָה מִמֶּנּוּ בְּגֵט, אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁיָּצְאָה מִן הָאַחֲרוֹן בְּמֵאוּן, וְאֵין צָרִיךְ לוֹמַר אִם גֵּרְשָׁהּ הָאַחֲרוֹן אוֹ מֵת. וְכֵן אֲסוּרָה לַאֲבִי הָרִאשׁוֹן, וְלִבְנוֹ, וּלְאֶחָיו, כִּשְׁאָר הַגְּרוּשׁוֹת, אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁיָּצָת מִן הָאַחֲרוֹן בְּמֵאוּן. וְאִם מֵאֲנָה בָּרִאשׁוֹן, וְהֶחֱזִירָהּ וְגֵרְשָׁהּ וְנִשֵּׂאת לְאַחֵר וְנִתְאַלְמְנָה אוֹ נִתְגָּרְשָׁה אוֹ מֵאֲנָה בּוֹ, אֲסוּרָה לַחֲזֹר לָרִאשׁוֹן וְלִקְרוֹבָיו. שֶׁכָּל שֶׁיָּצָת מִמֶּנּוּ בְּמֵאוּן לְבַסוֹף, דִּינָהּ כִּמְמָאֶנֶת; וְכֹל שֶׁיָּצָת מִמֶּנּוּ בְּגֵט לְבַסוֹף, דִּינָהּ כִּמְגֹרֶשֶׁת:
10 A female minor who did mei'un (declared her marriage annulled) receives no ketubah [whether] a hundred or two hundred [zekukim], but does receive an addition [made to the ketubah]. All the time she had not done mi'un, her husband has a right to her handiwork and whatever she finds. He is obligated to feed her and redeem her all the time she is living with him. But he went overseas and she borrowed to eat or to redeem herself, and she [then] rose up and did mei'un, he is not obligated to pay, even if he ate her fruit [profits arising from her possessions], and even if they still exist, such as if he collected them and they are lying in his jurisdiction, he does not return them. Regarding properties of tzon barzel and melog [], if they still exist, he takes them. If some of the tzon barzel were lost, he must pay, but from the melog property he is exempt. He is permitted to [marry] her relatives [after mei'un] and she is permitted to his relatives. She is kosher to [marry] the priesthood and she does not need to wait three months to marry [again]. If she married another man and he divorced her or died, she is permitted to return to the first [husband she did mi'un with]. Furthermore, even if the first divorced her and took her back, and she did mi'un with him, and she married someone else after she gave him mi'un, and the other divorced her, she may return to the first. For whoever goes out with mi'un, even if there was a divorce beforehand, it as if she was never divorced from him with a divorce document and she may return to him. But if one divorces a female minor with a divorce document, she receives a ketubah, and he is forbidden to her relatives, and she is forbidden to his relatives, and she is forbidden to priesthood, and she needs to wait for three months. And if she married another and did mei'un to him, she may not return to the first because she left him with a divorce document, even though she left the last one with mei'un. And this obviously applies if the last one divorced her or died. She is also forbidden to the father of the first one and to his son, and to his brothers, like other divorced women, even though she left the last one with mei'un. And if she did mei'un with the first, and he took her back and divorced her and she married another and became a widow or was divorced or did mi'un to him, she may not return to the first or to his relatives. For whoever left him with mi'un in the end, her law is that of a woman who did mi'un. And whoever left him with a divorce in the end, her law is that of a divorced woman.
יא הַמְמָאֶנֶת בַּיָבָם, אֲסוּרָה בְּאָבִיו, מִפְּנֵי שֶׁנִּרְאֵית כְּכַלָּתוֹ בְּעֵת שֶׁמֵּת בְּנוֹ וְנָפְלָה לְיִבּוּם. אֲבָל לִשְׁאָר קְרוֹבִים, מֻתֶּרֶת. וְיֵשׁ אוֹמְרִים גַּם בִּשְׁאָר קְרוֹבִים. וְדַוְקָא בִּקְרוֹבֵי הַמֵת, אֲבָל בִּקְרוֹבֵי הַיָּבָם שֶׁמֵאֲנָה בּוֹ מֻתֶּרֶת (כ"כ הב"י). וּמִכָּל מָקוֹם אִם מֵאֲנָה בְּאֶחָד מֵהַיְבָמִים, מֻתֶּרֶת לִשְׁאָר אַחִין:
11 She who refuses the redeemer, is forbidden to marry his father, for she is looked upon like his daughter-in-law once his son (the original husband) dies and she must be redeemed. However, she is permitted to marry other relatives (of the husband). Some say that (she) additionally (cannot marry) any other relatives (of the husband). She is originally (not allowed to marry) any of the deceased husband's relatives (except for the redeemer), but if the redeemer refused her, then she is allowed to marry his relatives (This is how the Beit Yosef ruled). And always, if she refuses one of the redeemers, she is permitted to marry the other brothers.
יב עַד מָתַי הַקְּטַנָּה מְמָאֶנֶת, עַד שֶׁתָּבִיא ב' שְׂעָרוֹת אַחַר י"ב שָׁנָה, אוֹ עַד שֶׁתֵּלֵד. וּמִשְּׁעַת הֵרָיוֹן הָוֵי כִּגְדוֹלָה (א"ז). וְכָל זְמַן שֶׁלֹּא הֵבִיאָה ב' שְׂעָרוֹת וְלֹא יָלְדָה, חֲשׁוּבָה כִּקְטַנָּה, אֲפִלּוּ נוֹלְדוּ לָהּ סִימָנֵי אַיְלוֹנִית. אֲבָל אִם הִיא בַּת עֶשְׂרִים, וְנוֹלְדוּ בָּהּ סִימָנֵי אַיְלוֹנִית, חֲשׁוּבָה כִּגְדוֹלָה לְמַפְרֵעַ, מִזְמַן שֶׁהָיְתָה בַּת י"ב, אַף עַל גַּב שֶׁהֵבִיאָה אַחַר כָּךְ שְׁתֵּי שְׂעָרוֹת (בְּחֹשֶן הַמִשְׁפָּט סִי' רל"ה), וְאֵינָהּ יְכוֹלָה לְמָאֵן. וּבַת י"ט שָׁנָה וּשְׁלשִׁים יוֹם, דִּינָהּ כְּבַת כ', דְּל' יוֹם בַּשָּׁנָה חָשׁוּב שָׁנָה. וְיֵשׁ מִי שֶׁאוֹמֵר, שֶׁאֵינָהּ חֲשׁוּבָה בַּת כ' שָׁנָה עַד שֶׁתִּהְיֶה בַּת כ' שָׁנָה פָּחוֹת ל' יוֹם:
12 Until when may a minor reject [a marriage contracted for her by other family members in the absence of her father]? Until she grows two [pubic] hairs after [the age of] twelve years, or unitl she gives birth. and from the time when [she becomes] pregnant, she is considered an adult (Or Zarua). As long as she has not grown two hairs and has not given birth, she is considered a minor, even if she shows signs of being an aylonit. (aylonit- a woman who never goes through normal puberty.) But if she is twenty years of age, and shows signs of being an aylonit, then she is considered an adult retroactively from the time she turned twelve, even if she grows two hairs later (Choshen Mishpat 235), and she may not reject [the marriage]. A woman who is nineteen years and thirty days of age has the same law as one who is twenty years of age, since thirty days in a year are considered as a year. And there is [also an authority] who says that she is not considered [as though she was] twenty years of age until she is twenty years minus thirty days of age.
יג אִם הִיא בַּת כ', וְלֹא נוֹלְדוּ בָּהּ סִימָנֵי אַיְלוֹנִית וְלֹא הֵבִיאָה שְׁתֵּי שְׂעָרוֹת, חֲשׁוּבָה כִּקְטַנָּה עַד שֶׁתָּבִיא ב' שְׂעָרוֹת אוֹ שֶׁתַּגִּיעַ לְרֹב שְׁנוֹתֶיהָ שֶׁהֵם ל"ה שָׁנָה וְיוֹם אֶחָד, שֶׁאָז הֲרֵי הִיא אַיְלוֹנִית אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁלֹּא נִרְאוּ בָּהּ סִימָנֵי אַיְלוֹנִית, וַחֲשׁוּבָה כִּגְדוֹלָה וְאֵינָהּ יְכוֹלָה לְמָאֵן. וְע"ל סִי' קע"ב סִימָנֵי אַיְלוֹנִית מַה הֵם:
13 If she is twenty years old and has no signs of infertility nor has she grown two pubic hairs, she is considered to be of minor age until she has two pubic hairs or until she arrives at the age of thirty-five and one day which is the majority of her years; at that point she is considered infertile even if she has no signs of infertility and she is not allowed to refuse. (see above in paragraph 172 where the signs of infertility are enumerated.)
יד אֵין שְׁתֵּי שְׂעָרוֹת סִימָן גַּדְלוּת אֶלָּא אִם כֵּן בָּאוּ מִי"ב שָׁנָה וְאֵילָךְ, אֲבָל אִם בָּאוּ קֹדֶם לָכֵן, אֲפִלּוּ תּוֹךְ שְׁנַת שְׁנֵים עָשָׂר, חֲשִׁיבִי כְּשׁוּמָא, וְאֵינָהּ נֶחֱשֶׁבֶת גְּדוֹלָה עַל יָדָם, אֶלָּא אִם כֵּן הֵבִיאָה אֲחֵרוֹת אַחַר שְׁנֵים עָשָׂר שָׁנָה. וְיֵשׁ אוֹמְרִים שֶׁאִם הֵבִיאָה שְׂעָרוֹת בְּיוֹם אַחֲרוֹן שֶׁל שְׁנַת שְׁנֵים עָשָׂר חֲשׁוּבָה גְּדוֹלָה (טוּר בְּשֵׁם ר"ת וְכ"כ הָרֹא"שׁ). וּמִיהוּ, כְּשֶׁמּוֹצְאִים לָהּ שְׂעָרוֹת אַחַר הַזְּמַן, מַחֲזִיקִין אוֹתָהּ כִּגְדוֹלָה אֲפִלּוּ לַחֲלִיצָה, וְלֹא חַיְשִׁינָן שֶׁמָּא בָּאוּ קֹדֶם הַזְּמַן. וְיֵשׁ אוֹמְרִים שֶׁאִם נִרְאוּ בָּהּ ב' שְׂעָרוֹת קֹדֶם שְׁתֵּים עֶשְׂרֵה שָׁנָה, וְעוֹדָם עָלֶיהָ אַחַר שְׁתֵּים עֶשְׂרֵה שָׁנָה, אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁלֹּא הֵבִיאָה שְׂעָרוֹת אַחַר שְׁתֵּים עֶשְׂרֵה שָׁנָה, חֲשׁוּבָה כִּגְדוֹלָה לְמֵאוּן, וְאַף עַל פִּי כֵן חֲשׁוּבָה כִּקְטַנָּה לַחֲלִיצָה. סָפֵק אִם הִגִּיעָה לִשְׁנֵים עָשָׂר שָׁנִים אוֹ לֹא, אָזְלִינַן לְחֻמְרָא (בִּתְשׁוּבַת רַשְׁבִּ"א אִלֶף רי"ו):
14 Two [pubic] hairs are only a sign of majority age if they come in the twelfth year and on, but, if they came before this, even during the twelfth year, they are considered to be a mole, and the child is not considered of majority of age, unless more hairs comes up after twelve years. Rema: there are those that say if the hairs come up on the last day of the twelfth year she is considered of majority age (Tur in the name of Rabbeinu Tam and the Rosh wrote similarly). Nonetheless, if she brought forth hairs after the prescribed time, she is considered of majority age, even for halitza, and we are not considered if they may have come before the appropriate time. There are those that say if two hairs appeared before the twelfth year and they are still on her after the twelfth year, she is considered of majority age for declining a marriage, but she is nonetheless considered a minor for halitza. Rema: if there is a doubt as to whether or not she has reached twelve years we rule stringently (Responsum of Rashba 1216?)
טו כְּשֶׁבּוֹדְקִין אוֹתָהּ, בּוֹדְקִין עַל יְדֵי נָשִׁים כְּשֵׁרוֹת וְנֶאֱמָנוֹת. וַאֲפִלּוּ אִשָּׁה אַחַת בּוֹדְקָהּ, וְשׁוֹמְעִין לָהּ אִם הֵבִיאָה וְאִם לֹא הֵבִיאָה, וַאֲפִלּוּ הִיא קְרוֹבָה. וְעַיֵן לְקַמָן סִימָן קס"ט, אִם נָשִׁים נֶאֱמָנוֹת עַל שְׁנוֹתֶיהָ:
15 When she is checked it is done by approved women who are trusted. Even one woman can check her and we listen to her if she says that she has or hasn't (grown two pubic hairs), even if the woman is a close relative. (see below paragraph 169 regarding if women are believed regarding her age.)
טז שְׁתֵּי שְׂעָרוֹת צָרִיךְ שֶׁיִּהְיֶה בְּעִקָּרָן גֻּמּוֹת. וַאֲפִלּוּ שְׁתֵּיהֶן בְּגֻמָּא אַחַת הֲרֵי אֵלּוּ סִימָן. נִמְצְאוּ שְׁתֵּי גֻּמּוֹת זוֹ בְּצַד זוֹ וְאֵין בָּהֶן שֵׂעָר, הֲרֵי אֵלּוּ סִימָן, חֲזָקָה אֵין גֻּמָּא בְּלֹא שֵׂעָר, וּשְׂעָרוֹת הָיוּ בָהֶם וְנָשְׁרוּ:
16 The two hairs must have a follicle at their root. Even if both of them come from one follicle, this is considered a sign [of puberty]. If there are two follicles one next to another without hair, these are considered a sign [of puberty], there is a presumption that there are no follicles without hair, there had been hairs in them that fell out.
יז ב' שְׂעָרוֹת צְרִיכוֹת שֶׁיִּהְיוּ בִּמְקוֹם הָעֶרְוָה. וּבֵית הָעֶרְוָה כֻּלּוֹ מְקוֹם סִימָנִים, בֵּין לְמַעְלָה בֵּין לְמַטָּה, בֵּין עַל אֶבְרֵי הַזֶּרַע עַצְמָן. וְיֵשׁ מִי שֶׁאוֹמֵר, שֶׁאֲפִלּוּ אַחַת בְּגַבָּהּ וְאַחַת בִּכְרֵסָהּ, אוֹ אַחַת בְּקִשְׁרֵי אֶצְבְּעוֹתֶיהָ שֶׁל יָד וְאַחַת בְּקִשְׁרֵי אֶצְבְּעוֹתֶיהָ שֶׁל רֶגֶל, חֲשׁוּבָה גְּדוֹלָה לְמֵאוּן אֲבָל לֹא לַחֲלִיצָה:
17 The two hairs must be in the pubic region. The entire pubic region qualifies for signs of maturity, whether above or below [the genitals], and the genitals themselves. Some authorities say that even if one is on her back and one on her belly, or one is on her finger knuckles and one is one her toe knuckles, she is considered matured for the purposes of declining a rabbinic marriage, but not for the cancellation of a levirite marriage.
יח שִׁעוּר אֹרֶךְ הַשְּׁתֵּי שְׂעָרוֹת, מִשֶּׁיִּצְמְחוּ וְיִהְיוּ רְאוּיִים לְהִנָּטֵל בְּפִי הַזּוּג (פי', מִסְפִּרַיִם) אוֹ לִקְרֹץ בַּצִּפֹּרֶן, חֲשׁוּבָה גְּדוֹלָה לְמֵאוּן. אֲבָל אֵינָהּ חֲשׁוּבָה גְּדוֹלָה לַחֲלִיצָה עַד שֶׁיִּהְיֶה בָּהֶן כְּדֵי לָכֹף רֹאשָׁן לְעִקָּרָן. וְעַיֵן לְקַמָן בְּפֵרוּשׁ סֵדֶר הַחֲלִיצָה סִימָן כ"ז:
18 The length of the two hairs, from when they grow until they are fitting to be cut with scissors or to pull them out with fingernails, she is considered of majority age for refusing a marriage. But she is not considered of majority age for halitza until they are long enough to be folded over such that their top reaches the root. See further on in the commentary on the order of halitza number 27...
יט בַּמֶּה דְּבָרִים אֲמוּרִים שֶׁיְּכוֹלָה לְמָאֵן אַחַר י"ב שָׁנָה, כְּשֶׁבָּדְקוּ אוֹתָהּ וְלֹא הֵבִיאָה שְׁתֵּי שְׂעָרוֹת. אֲבָל סְתָמָא, מִשֶּׁיֵּשׁ לָהּ י"ב שָׁנָה אֵינֶנָּה יְכוֹלָה לְמָאֵן, חֲזָקָה שֶׁהֵבִיאָה שְׁתֵּי שְׂעָרוֹת. וּמִכָּל מָקוֹם לֹא תַּחֲלֹץ עַד שֶׁיִּבְדְּקוּ אוֹתָהּ וְיִמְצְאוּ שְׁתֵּי שְׂעָרוֹת:
19 In what case is she allowed to refuse a marriage after twelve years [of age]? When she is examined and she is not found to have two hairs. But in general when she is twelve years old she is not allowed to refuse, there is an assumption that she has two pubic hairs. Nonetheless she should not have halitza until she is examined and found to have two hairs.
כ בַּמֶּה דְּבָרִים אֲמוּרִים שֶׁיְּכוֹלָה לְמָאֵן כְּשֶׁבּוֹדְקִים אוֹתָהּ וְלֹא הֵבִיאָה, כְּשֶׁלֹא בָּעַל אַחַר הֱיוֹת לָהּ שְׁתֵּים עֶשְׂרֵה שָׁנָה וְיוֹם אֶחָד. אֲבָל אִם בָּא עָלֶיהָ אַחַר כָּךְ, אֵינָהּ יְכוֹלָה לְמָאֵן, שֶׁאַף עַל פִּי שֶׁאֵין מוֹצְאִין לָהּ סִימָנִין חוֹשְׁשִׁין שֶׁמָּא נָשְׁרוּ; שֶׁהוּא סָפֵק דְּאוֹרָיְתָא, שֶׁאִם הָיָה יָדוּעַ שֶׁהָיוּ לָהּ שְׁתֵּי שְׂעָרוֹת קֹדֶם שֶׁבָּא עָלֶיהָ הֲווֹ קִדּוּשִׁין גְּמוּרִים, שֶׁוַּדַּאי בָּעַל לְשֵׁם קִדּוּשִׁין, וְאִם קִדְּשָׁהּ אַחֵר לֹא הָיְתָה צְרִיכָה מִמֶּנּוּ גֵּט; וְכֵיוָן שֶׁהוּא סָפֵק דְּאוֹרָיְתָא חַיְשִׁינָן שֶׁמָּא הֵבִיאָה סִימָנִין קֹדֶם שֶׁבָּעַל, וּצְרִיכָה גֵּט מִסָפֵק. וְאִם מֵאֲנָה בּוֹ אַחַר שֶׁנִּבְעֲלָה, וְנִבְדְּקָה וְלֹא נִמְצְאוּ לָהּ שְׂעָרוֹת, וְנִתְקַדְּשָׁה לְאַחֵר, צְרִיכָה מִמֶּנּוּ גֵּט, מִסָפֵק, וַאֲסוּרָה לַחֲזֹר לוֹ, וְאִם נִשֵּׂאת תֵּצֵא מִזֶּה וּמִזֶּה; וְהַוָּלָד, סְפֵק מַמְזֵר מִשְּׁנֵיהֶם:
20 In what case may she decline a marriage after we check her and she has not yet grown [two hairs]? When she has not had sexual relations after the age of twelve years and one day. But if he had relations with her afterward she may not decline, for, even though we do not see the signs on her we are considered that the may have fallen out; which is a doubtful [case of] Torah [law], for if it was known that she had two hairs before she had relations it would be undoubtedly be considered marriage, for he certainly had relations with her for the sake of marriage, and if another person had married her [afterwards] she would not need a divorce document; and, since it is a doubtful [case of] Torah [law] we are concerned that she may have had the signs before they had relations and she would need a divorce document [to obviate] the doubt. And if she refused him after they had relations, and she was examined and not found to have [two] hairs, and she married another, she would need a bill of divorce from him, [to obviate] the doubt, and she would be forbidden to return to him, and she married she would have to leave both men and any children would be considered suspected bastards from either father.
כא הֵבִיאָה שְׁתֵּי שְׂעָרוֹת אַחַר שְׁתֵּים עֶשְׂרֵה שָׁנָה, וְלֹא בָּעַל אַחַר כָּךְ, הֲווֹ סְפֵק קִדּוּשִׁין. וְאִם בָּא לְהוֹצִיאָהּ צְרִיכָה גֵּט, מִדְּרַבָּנָן. וְאִם לֹא גֵּרְשָׁהּ, וְעָמְדָה וְנִתְקַדְּשָׁה לְאַחֵר, צְרִיכָה גֵּט מִשְּׁנֵיהֶם. וְאִם יִרְצוּ, מְגָרֵשׁ רִאשׁוֹן וְנוֹשֵׂא שֵׁנִי. אֲבָל אִם גֵּרַשׁ שֵׁנִי, לֹא יְקַיֵּם רִאשׁוֹן, שֶׁמָּא יֹאמְרוּ: הֶחֱזִיר גְּרוּשָׁתוֹ אַחַר שֶׁנִּתְאָרְסָה. וְאִם בָּא עָלֶיהָ שֵׁנִי קֹדֶם שֶׁגֵּרַשׁ רִאשׁוֹן, תֵּצֵא מִזֶּה וּמִזֶּה, וְאֵין הַוָּלָד מִן הַשֵּׁנִי מַמְזֵר. וְאִם בָּא עָלֶיהָ רִאשׁוֹן קֹדֶם (גֵּרוּשֵׁי) שֵׁנִי, הַוָּלָד מַמְזֵר:
21 If she had two hairs after twelve years, and she did not have sexual relations, it would be considered doubtful marriage. And if he came to send her away he would need a divorce bill by rabbinic decree. And, if he didn't divorce her, and she married another, she would need a bill of divorce from both men. If they wished she could divorce the first and marry the second. But, if she divorced the second the first could not be upheld for people may say: he returned to his divorced wife after she was engaged. And if the second man had sexual relations with her before she divorced the first, she must divorce both of them, and the child of the second would not be considered a bastard. And if the first had relations with her before she (divorced) the second the child would be a bastard.
כב יֵשׁ אוֹמְרִים דְּהָאִדָּנָא יֵשׁ לְהַחֲמִיר שֶׁלֹּא תְּמָאֵן אַחַר שְׁתֵּים עֶשְׂרֵה שָׁנָה, אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁנִּבְדְּקָה וְלֹא נִמְצְאוּ לָהּ שְׁתֵּי שְׂעָרוֹת וְגַם לֹא בָּעַל אַחַר שְׁתֵּים עֶשְׂרֵה שָׁנָה. הַגָּה: וּלְכֻלֵּי עָלְמָא אִם הִיא פְּחוּתָה מִבַּת שְׁתֵּים עֶשְׂרֵה שָׁנָה מְמָאֶנֶת, אֲפִלּוּ בַּזְמַן הַזֶה. וְכֵן עָשָׂה מהר"ר יַעֲקֹב פּוֹלַק זַ"ל מַעֲשֶׂה בְּיָמָיו. וּדְלֹא כְּיֵשׁ מַחֲמִירִין וְאָמְרוּ שֶׁאֵין בַּת מְמָאֶנֶת בַּזְמַן הַזֶה כְּלָל (מהר"ם מֵרִיזְבּוּרְק וְר"י מִינְץ סִימָן י"ג):
22 There are those that say that in today's day and age we should be strict and not allow a woman to decline a marriage after twelve years, even though she has been checked and not found to have two hairs and even though she has not had sexual relations after twelve years. Rema: and, according to everyone, if she is less than twelve years of age she may decline, even today. And our teacher and master Rabbi Yaakov Folk ob"m did so in his days. And this is not like those who are stringent who say there is no declining a marriage today at all (Maharam from Reisburg and R"Y Mintz #13).