ה שָׁלַח סִבְלוֹנוֹת לַמְשֻׁדֶּכֶת וְהָלְכָה וְנִשֵּׂאת לְאַחֵר, וְהַלָּה תּוֹבֵעַ סִבְלוֹנוֹתָיו, דִּינָם כְּמִלְוֶה בִּשְׁטָר. הַגָּה: אִם לָקְחָה יוֹתֵר מִכְּתֻבָּתָה וְנִשֵּׂאת, צָרִיךְ הַבַּעַל לְהַחֲזִיר הַמּוֹתָר (מַהֲרִי"ק שֹׁרֶשׁ י"ח). וְכֵן אִם נִתְחַיֶּבֶת מַס וְנִשֵּׂאת, הָוֵי כְּשָׁלַח הַסִּבְלוֹנוֹת, דְּכָל אֵלּוּ קָלָא אִית לְהוּ וְאֵין דֶּרֶךְ לַעֲשׂוֹת בָּהֶן שְׁטָר, לָכֵן הָוֵי כְּמִלְוֶה בִּשְׁטָר (מהר"ם פַּדָּוואָה סִימָן נ"ה). אֲבָל נִזָּקִין וּמֶקָּח וּדְבָרִים אֲחֵרִים, אֵין חַיָּב לְשַׁלֵּם (נִמּוּקֵי יוֹסֵף פֶּרֶק יֵשׁ נוֹחֲלִין). אִשָּׁה שֶׁשִּׁדְּכָה בִּתָּהּ לְאִישׁ וְנִתְחַיְּבָה בִּנְדוּנְיָא, וְאַחַר כָּךְ נִשֵּׂאת בְּעַצְמָהּ לְאִישׁ, הַמְשֻׁדָּךְ לְבִתָּהּ מוֹצִיא כָּל מַה שֶּׁנִּתְחַיְּבָה מִבַּעֲלָהּ מִנְּכָסִים שֶׁהִכְנִיסָה לוֹ, דְּהָוֵי כְּמִלְוֶה בִּשְׁטָר; אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁבְּשָׁעָה שֶׁעָשְׂתָה הַשִּׁדּוּכִין לְבִתָּהּ עֲדַיִן לֹא נִשְׁבְּעָה עַל כְּתֻבָּתָהּ, מִכָּל מָקוֹם מֵאַחַר דְּנִשְׁבַּעַת לְבַסוֹף אִגְּלַי מִלְּתָא לְמַפְרֵעַ דְּמַה שֶּׁעָשְׂתָה תְּחִלָּה בַּדִין הָיָה (בֵּית יוֹסֵף בְּשֵׁם תְּשׁוּבַת הָרַשְׁבָּ"א). יֵשׁ אוֹמְרִים הָא דְּמִלְוֶה בִּשְׁטָר גּוֹבֶה מִן הַבַּעַל מִנְּכָסִים שֶׁהִכְנִיסָה לוֹ, הַיְנוּ שֶׁהִכְנִיסָה לוֹ קַרְקַע אוֹ מִטַּלְטְלִין וְכָתְבָה לְבַעְלָהּ חוֹב הַמִּטַּלְטְלִים אַגַּב קַרְקַע; אֲבָל לֹא כָּתְבָה לוֹ אַגַּב, וְלֹא הִכְנִיסָה לוֹ רַק מִטַּלְטְלִין, אֲפִלּוּ מִלְוֶה בִּשְׁטָר אֵינָהּ גּוֹבָה מִבַּעֲלָהּ, דְּאֵין בַּעַל חוֹב טוֹרֵף מִמְטַּלְטְלִין הַמְשֻׁעְבָּדִים (תְּשׁוּבַת רַמְבַּ"ן סִימָן נ"ו); וּסְבָרָא נְכוֹנָה הִיא. וּמ"מ נִרְאֶה לְהוּ, דִּבְמַכְנֶסֶת שֶׁאֵינָהּ שֶׁלָּהּ, כְּגוֹן שֶׁלָּקְחָה יָתֵר מִכְּתֻבָּתָהּ, חַיָּב לְהַחֲזִיר בְּכָל עִנְיָן. וְעַיֵּן בְּח"ה סוֹף סִימָן צ"ו (נִתְבָּאֵר לְעֵיל):
5 If one sent bridal gifts to a woman to whom he had been introduced as a potential spouse, but she went and married a different man, and the first demanded the return of his bridal gifts, their rule is as if he had lent money under a written agreement. Rema: If she took more than the amount she would be entitled to in her ketubah and then married, the husband is obliged to return the excess (from the R'iK, root 18). And similar if she owed taxes and married, it is like the case of the sender of bridal gifts, because these are subject to a leniency because there is no way to produce written agreements about them, and so we treat them as if they were loans that did have written agreements (Maharam of Padua, section 95). But tort damages and negotiated business debts and other things, he is not obliged to pay (Nimukei Yosef, the chapter "Some inherit"). A woman who arranged a marriage for her daughter to a man and committed to a dowry, and later herself married: the daughter's prospective husband may claim what the mother committed to from her husband against the assets she brought to the marriage, just as if it were a loan with a written agreement; even though at the time that she arranged her daughter's marriage she had not yet engaged the vows of her ketubah, still since she eventually engage that vow, we consider her words even out of the order they happened, since what she did originally was justified. (Beit Yoseph quoting a responsum of the Rashba). Some say since it is as if it was a written loan we collect from the husband out of the assets she brought to the marriage, that is, if she brought him real property or movable property and wrote a debt to her husband of the movable property against the value of the real property; but if she did not write about it, and only brought the movable property to the marriage, even one who had loaned her money with a written agreement may not collect it from her husband, as a debt-holder may not seize movables that are already subordinated (responsum of Nachmanides paragraph 56). And it is logically reasonable. And it is apparently a reasonable negogiation, since in propertly she brought to the marriage but that she doesn't hold title to, for example if she took more than her holding in the ketubah, he must in any case return it. And see Hoshen HaMishpat the end of section 96 (explained there).